Whenever you get a new job, move to a new city or make a similar life transition, people often ask: How did you get here? That got me thinking. Are you ever here? I think we spend too much time trying to arrive, when every point that we’re at along the path is the right spot, always and forever.
We — specifically, Millennials in their 20s and 30s — spend too much time trying to force our lives into a preset timetable or a predetermined journey that’s created by what we presume is “success.” And that stops us from letting coincidences take us to the best point in our lives that we could be in in that precise moment. And eventually, I think that’s why so many people in my age demographic are unsettled, unhappy and unsure of themselves.
Our lives are ruled by coincidences if we let them happen — little miracles that perpetually point the way according to who we are in the moment. Right now, I’ve never been happier in terms of who I am, what I do for a living and where I may or may not be going. But if I’d scheduled or forced my life into the path that I thought was “right” for me five years ago — or 15 years ago — I’d be in a completely different universe.
Today, I took time to plot out major life-changing actions/decisions that occurred all the way back to when I was six or seven. Every single thing that has led me to this point has been a random decision, a chance encounter and a coincidental choice. Literally. I could go into in-depth detail and you’d truly see how random everything has been, but to put it broadly: a random farm book led me into writing as a hobby; a side remark in a conversation caused me to switch universities at the last moment; and stumbling upon someone else’s Facebook status created a shift in my actual career.
Try to live without a forced plan. I’m not saying that you should live recklessly, running around without goals or ideals. But it is important to keep an open mind and allow coincidences to shift you into new opportunities as they arise instead of struggling against the coincidental.
Being available, flexible and open frees you to be happy and satisfied right here, right now, instead of reaching for some satisfaction or happiness in the nonexistent future that depends on your artificially predetermined, yet-still-untraveled, journey.